The Inside Scoop on the Drug Smugglers #6: Throwing the police off our trail
Life goes on at the Smugglish Team as usual except for one thing: Interpol has gotten onto our trail. As you know if you have read the introduction on Foghorn, we created Foghorn to throw off Interpol. But for some reason, Foghorn hasn't been enough. Maybe we need to write more articles. But anyway, we have invented several ways to get the police off our trail. This is difficult, because we have over sixty different trails leading to our hideout from major cities all over the world. In fact, since the beginning of Foghorn, 276 Interpol policeman have found us, 15 in May, 46 in June, 74 in July, 84 in August, and 57 in September. Of these 276, we have got them all to keep quiet by incorporating 37 into the Smugglish Team, convincing 23 that we are actually smuggling drug for the good of humanity, and bribing the remaining 216 with a total of over $4,000,000.
But we have found several ways to get the police off our trail. One is to put up a sign saying "Drug Smugglers' Cove: 3 miles", and then have a random path that leads to nowhere. Another thing we do is put up newspaper articles about sewage problems in the North Atlantic on billboards that are close to our hideout. The policemen get so completely absorbed that they forget what they were going to do in about five minutes. But the final and best thing we do is hang up signs saying in big, wide letters, "INTERNATIONAL PAINT CO. HEADQUARTERS, NEXT RIGHT". Then all the policemen get terrified and either run away or faint from dehydration. You see, almost all the Interpol policemen used to work for the International Paint Co., and when they left to work for Interpol, their former teammates got so angry that they became filled with the desire to get revenge. So the Interpol policemen have to hide from the International Paint Co. for their entire lives. Sometimes as a finishing touch, we have it say in tiny letters at the bottom, "We work for you". We hope that with these new methods, less than 25 policemen will discover us by the end of October.
Life goes on at the Smugglish Team as usual except for one thing: Interpol has gotten onto our trail. As you know if you have read the introduction on Foghorn, we created Foghorn to throw off Interpol. But for some reason, Foghorn hasn't been enough. Maybe we need to write more articles. But anyway, we have invented several ways to get the police off our trail. This is difficult, because we have over sixty different trails leading to our hideout from major cities all over the world. In fact, since the beginning of Foghorn, 276 Interpol policeman have found us, 15 in May, 46 in June, 74 in July, 84 in August, and 57 in September. Of these 276, we have got them all to keep quiet by incorporating 37 into the Smugglish Team, convincing 23 that we are actually smuggling drug for the good of humanity, and bribing the remaining 216 with a total of over $4,000,000.
But we have found several ways to get the police off our trail. One is to put up a sign saying "Drug Smugglers' Cove: 3 miles", and then have a random path that leads to nowhere. Another thing we do is put up newspaper articles about sewage problems in the North Atlantic on billboards that are close to our hideout. The policemen get so completely absorbed that they forget what they were going to do in about five minutes. But the final and best thing we do is hang up signs saying in big, wide letters, "INTERNATIONAL PAINT CO. HEADQUARTERS, NEXT RIGHT". Then all the policemen get terrified and either run away or faint from dehydration. You see, almost all the Interpol policemen used to work for the International Paint Co., and when they left to work for Interpol, their former teammates got so angry that they became filled with the desire to get revenge. So the Interpol policemen have to hide from the International Paint Co. for their entire lives. Sometimes as a finishing touch, we have it say in tiny letters at the bottom, "We work for you". We hope that with these new methods, less than 25 policemen will discover us by the end of October.
posted by Jaja at 4:52 PM
1 Comments:
Dear Anonymous #1,
I already have a job that pays $5 bucks an hour, and I do not need another job. Beside, I can't stand people who are inspecific on how much pay their going to give me. Thanks for bookmarking me though.
Dear Anonymous #2,
Sure! Posts all the links you want! See what I care! Yessss, see what I care, my precious. And thanks for the information about Japanese Bonsai. It will be useful for my pet hyrax.
Sincerely,
The Smugglish Team Foghorn Council
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